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Yes, bootlegs...illegal though they may be---they
are still great..I have heard quite a lot of them! I've taken on the task of transcribing some of those wonderful
between-song comments so that people who can't get certain bootlegs can read them.. Some are absolutely hilarious and it's
my pleasure to share them with you.
The infamous "Wasp Interlude" is here, among others!
Enjoy!
"Chew for fresh breath always! Thank-you!
I'm getting on a bit you know...and the memories start to fade. And the things that you held dear at one time..start to..*phew*
can hardly f**kin' see 'em, you know what I mean? But I remember the first time.." (goes into DYRTFT?, obviously..)
(right
before T.V. Movie...)
"Alright. Everybody wants to star in a Hollywood movie, yes? Yeah..alright--you're the star..ok.
Go to the premiere, do exciting things alright...but lemme tell you--no! You're gonna be in a T.V. mini-series written by
Jeffery Archer, ok? "Rich Man, Poor Man" was good---this is the follow-up: "Rich Man, Poor Man 2". Your life has become a
T.V. movie..."
(after Party Hard, lead-up to Help the Aged..)
"Someone left the cake out in the rain...Which is
stupid! Really spoiled the birthday party. There were lots of children there who were really f**ked off. To spend all that
time with icing and everything and to get all the right ingredients...And to make a cake right is difficult because you have
to mix all the stuff together right...And they left it out in the f**king rain! Stupid! And probably senile...probably f**king
senile!"
(right before Common People..)
"Well it's been uh..it's been an experience thank-you very much. And uh
we're gonna leave you now...I wanna say thank-you to Sonic Youth for allowing us to play this time cos our equipment was stuck.
Our equipment was stuck in Moscow. I mean, I've never been to Moscow, you know what I mean? My f**kin' amplifier has, you
know what I mean? My amplifier is more interesting than I am. My amplifier is more...is better travelled than I am. Don't
make no sense. It don't make no sense. *hiccup*"
The "Get Frisky..With Pulp" bootleg is a grab-bag
of live Pulp stuff and isn't especially fantastic...The Babies from Glastonbury '94, the Monday Morning from The White Room,
the His 'n' Hers from ButtNaked '94 and the Peel Session recordings are the best inclusions on this bootleg. During His 'n'
Hers, when they reach the "I'm frightened of..." part Jarvis asks a couple of people in the audience what they're frightened
of..(and here we get the aforementioned 'wasp interlude') Read on for a transcription of that bit of dialogue.
"What makes you frightened?"
(guy in audience) "Early evening television..."
"I know what you're sayin'...How about
you--what makes you frightened?"
(woman in audience) "What makes me what?"
"Frightened.."
(woman) "Uh...wasps.."
"Sorry?"
(woman) "Wasps.."
"Wasps? Well yeah cos they just sting
people for no reason at all.. If a bee stings ya, then it's got a reason..cos it has to pay with it's life. Whereas wasps
can just sting people for no reason at all as many times as they want. And there are some people like that as well.. In fact--some
people even enjoy stingin' ya...as many times as they can... Anyways I'm getting away from the subject..." (He then continues
with the rest of the song)
Bristol Sound City is an entertaining bootleg..
(set-list: Razzmatazz, Monday Morning,
Pencil Skirt, Mile End, DYRTFT?, Underwear, Acrylic Afternoons, Babies* )
"I don't know if any of you have been squatters...anybody
ever been a- or maybe is a squa- uh it's quite it's quite difficult to be a squatter now, innit? Because of the criminal*
justice* pulling* all that kind of thing... But uh when I went down to London to go to art college and that I couldn't afford
to live anywhere so we squatted... It doesn't mean that you have to be like this all the time-- *squats down* "an' I had to
go to the shops like that.. *audience laughs* "But uh yeah we- and we ended up in a place called Mile End which uh *audience
cheers & yells* "Oh I- I wouldn't cheer it meself.. *audience laughs* "It was the worst nine months of my life and uh
what we've done in this song is I've tried to uh express.. the horror...the sheer, abject horror of that uh situation... *laughs*
"And this a song called Mile End..."
(song starts)
"Alright for me it's quite a long time ago but for- maybe for
some other people it's not that long ago... D'ya know what I'm talking about? *audience yells "Yeah!"* "What? *audience says
"First time" & "Do you remember the first time?"* "Do I remember the? *aud: "First time!"* "Second time? ...I don't remember
any of the times to be honest... *guy in audience screams "Liar!"* "I remember the last time..." (song starts)
(Jarvis
has picked up a guitar for Babies)
"Alright this is uh...this is this...this is uh...uz on the stage and that's you there...
Are we establishing some kind of rapport, d'ya think? *audience cheers* "There's no point in uz coming to Bristol and just
playing as if you were a blank wall... We want to touch you...alright? *audience screams* *guy in audience screams "Put it
down you know you can't play it!"--referring to the geetar* *strums guitar* "I can play it actually...I am fah-king brilliant
actually... *audience cheers* *strums guitar very quickly* "Anyways this is one maybe you may have heard..." (song starts)
(*'s after words indicate that i am unsure of them)
Common People [Berlin] is a great
bootleg. The 2 CD format is kinda irritating, but that's the only bad thing about it.. Read on for some super-funny comments!!
[After Monday Morning] "Sheffield
oh dear. Anybody here from Bockham? That's Sheffield's twin town.. Yes, we have our Bockham parkway.. In Mackrow's [??] there
you can get very good discount electrical goods. Erm.. there was a funny thing the other day - but I can't remember it.."
[etc..]
[After Something Changed] "Can you see me n*pples? *adopts higher-toned, lispy voice* Yes, welcome to Berlin's
wet t-shirt contest.. I'm very s*xually excited at the moment.. and that's why you can see my er#ct n*pples through my shirt..
We have exotic dancers later on.. Oh yessss, come one. *back to his regular voice* I don't know why anybody would shove anything
bigger than a hamster up their arse!"
[After Sorted] "I was gonna go to the uh Telly [?] Tower today.. Cos I went
there - I went there 7 years ago and I had some cabbage soup. Hmm [*speaks German*] so nice. But I've heard it's gone all
trendy now - is that right? I've heard it goes around at 78rpm [??] and all your blood separates out - so all your red blood
cells are in your feet and all yer plasma's in yer head. So.. I don't understand it so I don't know how I expect you to..
Alright then. But this is - we all understand music because music is uh international language innit that right, Russ?"
[After
Pencil Skirt] "That's a nice cup of tea, yeah. It's not Liptons.. PG Tiffs [??]. You cheeky monkey! You cheeky bloody monkey!"
[After Disco 2000][Intro to Babies] "Alright this is about.. watching - when you're at that age when you really -
you kinda know about sex but you've not done it. And you want to know more about it.. and you- you'll find out wherever you
can like you find a porn mag thrown away in a bin and you look at it and you think 'I wouldn't mind some of that, yeah.' Uh
huh. And also maybe you hide in a wardrobe and you watch your best friend's sister doing it.."
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